Yesterday I had a massive argument with my Mum. I was offered a job at her work and I said I was not ready yet because I want to stay at home with Harry and I will go back to work when he is at school, plus it wouldn’t benefit us after childcare etc.
Anyway she said “I don’t see why you don’t just take that job” So I explained again that I want to stay at home with Harry and she said and I quote “Your so lazy” that was it! We went backwards and forwards me giving my reasons and she said “people have to go to work” so I explained that yes some people do have to but I don’t so why should I?
I am sick to death of people thinking that being a SAHM is the lazy option. I don’t sit at home all day and I don’t receive any benefits (not that I judge people that do)
She also said “You should work to help Tom out” Which really did get to me. Iv’e had the feeling’s of guilt and am I being selfish staying at home. Iv’e felt that I’m not doing enough. I’ve had all the tears and upset over this so the last person I wanted to hear all this from was my own mother!
I told her “Well done for being a crap mother and making me feel like shit again” Because this is not the first time she has made me feel bad. She has never been a good mother.
I have vowed to never make my children feel the way she makes me feel. She is never there for me. For instance when I had to go to hospital for a panic attack we asked her to come and watch Harry and wait for the older children to come home from school. I called her after I was being seen to let her know what was happening and her first words were “Your going to be there for ages then” Yeah thank’s mum when I’m in here for panic attacks! Then when we got home she had taken the kids to her house (with no car seat and no reason) and when I said can you bring them home now she said “No you will have to come and get them because it was a pain in the arse getting them here with no car seat”
See what I mean? This is just a little bit of what she is like!